No, I don’t know why…but this just cracks me up.

On another note…what did I accomplish from my goals list this week?  Not much.  So I’m just going to watch the video a few more times and laugh.

Okay, okay.  So I didn’t win an Academy Award.  But thanks to Emma Meade, over at Emma’s Ramblings on Supernatural Fiction, I have won the Kreative Blogger Award.

In all my life I’d never have dreamed that someone from Ireland would read and enjoy my blog, so I’m doubly honored.  In case I haven’t mentioned it, I love Ireland!

Okay, so there are some rules that come with this award and they are…

Thank my nominator, provide a link to her blog, list 7 things readers might find interesting about me, and nominate 7 others.

So, thank you, Emma!  This is such an honor.  I’ll try to get out this afternoon to shop for a dress.  Should I hire a professional makeup artist?  How many photographers do you think will be present?  (kidding!)

Seven things, hmm?  Do they have to be interesting?

1.  When I was a teenager, I punched my fist through the window on a door when a former friend slammed it in my face during an argument.  Even though my arm and hand were dripping with blood, I only have one tiny scar from my first (and last) window breaking experience.

2.  (Seven???!!!)  Have I mentioned that I kissed Tony Orlando on a dare?  Yup.  Smack on the lips.

3.  Have I also mentioned that the hair stylist my daughter and I go to knows someone who knows someone who went to school with Taylor Lautner?  OMGosh!  That almost makes him family!

4.  In 9th grade I was chosen as one of the four most promising authors in our school (and it was a large school).  The four of us got to ‘skip’ a day so we could go with the creative writing teacher to an all-day conference to meet ‘real’ authors and have our work critiqued.  It was quite an honor.

5.  I have have come close to dying on no less than four occasions.  One near head-on collision when I was about ten (and I mean both cars coming within a couple of inches-at 70 mph), one high speed accident four years ago, a near drowning at seven, and one very high risk pregnancy.

6.  I lived in both California and Florida.  Unfortunately it was well before I turned four so I have no memory of either state.

7.  I once made a little Christmas village entirely out of toothpicks.  Can we say way too much time on my hands that year?

It’s funny but my life doesn’t seem boring…until I try to come up with a few interesting things about me.

Now for my nominations…

Collin Falconer tops this list.  His blog, Looking for Mr Goodstory, is always well researched, informative…and almost always makes me laugh.

Louise Behiel, at Journey of a Thousand Miles, is just…  I don’t even know what I can say here.  Except that I learn so much from her insight into the human mind.  It’s amazing!

Jenny Bean is next on my list.  The first time I visited her blog, ‘the madcap adventures of a single woman who went to the bank to become a mommy,’ I literally giggled off and on for days after reading about a telephone call from a police officer…asking her to make her grandma stop calling them.  When I can’t sleep, her blog is my first choice for entertainment.

Jaki Cheli just started blogging in January…and celebrated her 77th birthday on May 31 so she’s definitely making this short list.  That alone is worthy of an award!

Now Samantha Uzair, at So Weird Sam, is a young lady I’ve come to know through Facebook.  She started blogging in April (one post so far, Sam…get busy!).  I’m nominating her because of all the work she does with rescue animals.  I will always support someone who takes care of pets that others don’t want or mistreat.  She also likes the BSB’s…yay, Sam!

Natalie Hartford, over at Life Out Loud, has got to go on this list, too.  Like Jenny Bean, she cracks me up.  She’s also very involved in the fight against impaired driving…a cause I support 100%.

Last, but certainly not least, is the Backwoods Mom, ‘alaska…a bazillion kids…bears…moose…me.’  Biological kids, adopted kids, helping her husband build a house in the wilderness…  Check out this very interesting and entertaining blog.

Eye of the tiger, fellow bloggers, eye of the tiger.  

So last week I posted this picture, and asked if anyone could guess what it was.  A couple of you thought it might be related to needlepoint, and another suggested that maybe it was a flower press.

Good guesses, but sorry, no cigar.  I did warn you that it wasn’t something that ‘normal’ people would own…

It’s actually called a ‘book jig,’ and I built this oh-so-classy little beauty about four years ago when the idea of self-publishing first crossed my mind.  It looks a bit rough because I just used scraps of wood I had laying around.

As you will note by the cover in the following two pictures, I am not an artist.  However, I did turn out about a dozen paperback copies of Reluctant Guardian (and sold most of them).

Obviously this is just showing the finished product.  This is the first experiment, and the only reason I didn’t sell it, too.  The binding on each subsequent copy looked better than this one (which didn’t have the extra strip of paper, explained below).

Basically you insert an unbound copy of your manuscript so that everything is lined up.  Then you apply a thin layer of Gorilla Glue with a damp cotton swab…and sit patiently for the next half hour or so smoothing it out with more damp cotton swabs, and pieces of waxed paper and cellophane.

When the glue finally stops expanding, and is still just the tiniest bit tacky, you apply a strip of the same material your book cover is printed on, and finally some good old Elmer’s glue on top of that.

The last step in the process is to apply your pre-folded cover…and I mean you use something like a ruler to make sure the folds along the spine are flat.  Hold it tightly for another few minutes, apply a weight for a couple of hours and there ya go.  A paperback back book that looks…homemade.

For anyone who might be interested in hand-binding books, apparently someone published a guide this year called ‘How To Build a DIY Bookbinding Jig-A Step-by-Step.’   I found instructions online for free.  Just a word of caution though…  The printing costs are astronomical, and it takes quite awhile to print an average size book.  Then  you need to plan on a good hour per copy to deal with the Gorilla Glue and cover.

Thanks for playing ‘What In The World?! Wednesdays’ with me.  Let’s see if I can stump you again next week.  🙂

*If you’re wondering about the paper taped on the jig, I added it because a few pages would slide between the bottom and side pieces, effectively screwing up the binding.

I was listening to one of my playlists tonight and heard a song I fell in love with when I was a kid.  I don’t even remember adding it, but I must have heard it on the radio at some point during the last three years, found it was available…and promptly forgotten  all about it (easy to do when you have eighteen playlists).

It kind of surprises me that I like it at all since my parents were into 100% country…and the twangier the better.  The only time I got to listen to ‘real’ music was when I was visiting cousins or friends.  At least until I got my own alarm clock radio for Christmas when I was a teenager.

It’s not that I hate country music because I don’t (depending on the twang factor anyway).  These days it’s hard to tell the difference between some of that and the good stuff…like REO Speedwagon and the BSB’s.

But not everything my parents listened to made me shudder.  And the song that sparked this post struck a powerful chord with me back then.  It still does today.

This isn’t a song I hear very often, but when I do I just close my eyes and listen to the words…because he tells an amazing story.  Kind of like a micro-mini audio book.

I realized as I listened tonight that I’ve always been drawn to music that tells what I consider real stories.  I shared one of those favorites with you in May – Kenny Rogers, ‘Twenty Years Ago.’

Another song that will grab and hold my attention…and never fail to leave me with tears streaming down my face…is Brad Paisley’s, ‘He Didn’t Have to Be.’

The second I heard this song, I was completely floored.  I knew I had to write a story about a dad like that.  And so Sam Jenson, one of the stars of A Hero For Holly, was born.  He’s based partly on the father in this video, and partly on my dad.  That makes him one of my most special characters.

But, before this turns into a tribute to fathers (mine in particular), I’ll get back to the point I intended to make when I began writing this post.

Music can be just background noise, depending on what sort you choose.  Some can make you smile…like this one (it made me smile the first time I heard it)…

~~~~~

But some music…some music…can touch you so deeply that it will stay with you forever.

Yes, I know.  After all of my big talk about plans and updates, I didn’t post one last week.  There is a really good reason for that though.  A serious case of insomnia reared its ugly head.  At one point I’d gotten roughly nine hours sleep out of eighty-four.  I was, literally, a zombie for a couple of weeks.

So anyway, now that I’m getting that under control (sort of), I’m back at the editing.  So far I’ve used the Ctrl/f to check that I’ve used there, their, they’re, and  two (still have to do to/too, hour/our and a few others).  Even though it’s easier than trying to spot them during a read-through, it’s still boring and time consuming.  I also made sure all of the chapter headings were in caps and that all of those and the page breaks were centered.  And I think I’ve been successful at changing it so I have the first line thing set at two throughout the entire manuscript.

After I finish the Ctrl/f to make sure all of the most common homonyms are in order, I’ll start the ‘real’ editing, and checking out all the red, green and blue lines.

That’s my favorite part.  I love seeing what grammar check advises me to do with the words and phrases it has a problem with.  For instance, in this sentence,  “Well blow out the candles…,” ‘blow’ is blue-lined.  Not entirely sure how that could be wrong, I looked and grammar check suggested I change it to, “Well below out the candles…”

Um…..

Yeah.

Not!

Obviously I’ll never agree with that sort of suggestion…but it’s always good for a chuckle.  I’m not sure who programmed that feature, but I’m guessing they never passed an English course.

Have you even laughed out loud when your writing program makes suggestions like changing blow to below?

With summer right around the corner, everyone is going to be a bit busier than usual…myself included.  So I’m changing things up just a bit, starting with a game I’m calling, ‘What in the World?! Wednesdays.’  Yes, I know today isn’t Wednesday, but I’m getting a head start on it (mostly because I lost track of time and this is all I’ve got).

I’ll be posting pictures, or parts of pictures, of things that might be found around the house, yard, garage, and maybe even around town.  If they’re not common, like this thingamajig, I’ll put the whole photo up.  If it’s too easy, I’ll just post a portion of it.  I’ll share the answer…along with the complete picture…the following Wednesday.

Can you guess what this is?  I’ll give you one clue.  It isn’t something ‘normal’ people would own.

*I did show this to one person which means she is disqualified from guessing.  So if you remember, Jaki, zip the lips please.  Well, fingers off the keyboard…

**Winners will receive their choice of a round-trip shuttle flight to the set of Total Recall on the planet Mars, or a ride in Marty McFly’s DeLorean to the year of their choosing.  Okay, I’m pulling your leg.  The only thing winners will receive is the satisfaction of having correctly guessed what the picture is and…well, that’s really about it.

***By the way, if you do guess what it is, you’ll have to wait until the following week to have it confirmed.  🙂

****And just to be really clear on the whole winners thing…  There will be no (none, zero, zilch, nada) trips to Mars or rides in Marty McFly’s DeLorean.

I have never attended a wedding that didn’t include this promise.  Or one very much like it, ‘As long as we both shall live.’  And on that momentous, life-changing day, every bride and groom means it with all of their heart.

But if I look at every couple I’ve ever known, I only know of two who actually made it to that point.  My grandparents and one aunt and uncle.

In every other marriage, at least one half of the couple has been divorced.

While the rate is declining, from 7.9 (per 1,000) in 1980 to 5.2 in 2008, the United States still leads the world in the number of divorces.  Frankly I’m not sure where the .9 and .2 come from because I think it’s pretty much impossible to divorce part of a person.

Anyway…

That’s a lot of divorcing.  And it makes me wonder what happens between the ‘You may kiss your bride,’ and the dissolution of the marriage.

Sure there are issues like abuse, alcohol and drugs in some cases, and we all can understand that.  But in normal, happy relationships, what happens?  Is it because boredom sets in?  Bad habits (like leaving the toilet seat up, or the cap off the toothpaste) that a husband or wife just can’t deal with?  I mean something was there in the beginning that clearly isn’t at the end.

I suspect some couples call it quits because if they don’t, the ’til death do us part’ will become an issue, resulting in a prison sentence for the surviving spouse.

Any thoughts on the matter?  What do you think are some of the causes of divorce these days?

Have you ever had a dream but, because others laughed at you…or made fun of you…you just gave up on it?  That’s the topic I’m covering today at my website in Never Let Go of Your Dreams.

Yeah…not!

I love walking in the rain on a warm day.  I love the sound a hard rain makes when it hits the roof and windows.  I even love the sound of thunder rumble in the distance (I do not, however, love lightening).

October and November are my favorite months for showers…when the days turn chilly and the air has a crisp, clean quality that it never has any other time of the year.  That’s the best time of year to experience a day stuck inside because it’s too wet to venture anywhere else.  The dampness outside works its way into the house, meaning it’s time to break out sweaters, fuzzy socks, candles, good books, and mugs of hot cocoa or hazelnut coffee.

But rain in the spring and summer…

Sorry, I’m from Michigan.  I know that farmers need it to grow crops.  I know it’s needed to prevent droughts, and to keep the levels of lakes and rivers where they should be.  Sometimes, on exceptionally hot and muggy days, a timely storm can bring an all too brief respite from the miserable heat and humidity (the downside being that it leaves the air even more humid in its wake).  Other than that blissful ten or fifteen minutes, though, I don’t enjoy warm weather rain.

Why?  Because it makes the air smell like worms.  Not that I’ve ever been close enough to a worm to touch one, much less sniff one, but that’s what I’ve always imagined they would smell like.

So I Googled it to make sure I wasn’t completely nuts…and I’m not the only one who thinks that.  In fact, according to Whydoes.org, the air does smell like worms.  Earthworms, to be specific.

It makes me wonder about all of the laundry supplies with names that proclaim to be rain-water fresh.  And all I can think of is why in the world would anyone want their clothes to smell like THAT?!

I was going to put up a video about a bird getting a worm, but this one is a lot more fun.  Doritos are much better than worms!

Oh please, can I please, please, please walk around in jeans and a tee shirt that smells like earthworms?  I don’t think so.  I’m not sure where the manufacturers came up with these advertising ideas, but obviously none of them strolled down any sidewalks in this state after a storm.

Has anyone else ever thought the air smelled like worms after it rains?