Once again I’ve been reminded to think first…and act later. Which I mostly did earlier today. But even while my logical self was telling me to calm down, that the odds were better than good that it was a mistake, the emotional part of me was upset and crying…and kind of wanting to be offended.
I always hate it when people post cryptic stuff on Facebook. In fact, I hate it so much, I’ve stopped responding to them in any way. However, I’m pretty much doing the same thing here by not going into details.
Hmm. How to explain this…without explaining it. Basically I had requested that someone make a change so that my privacy would not be invaded. Not ten minutes later, my privacy had been well and truly invaded.
Given that it was a computer/internet issue, and the fact that I know the person well enough to know that their computer knowledge is as strong as mine is regarding car engines (I know how to check the oil…and I know where the oil goes – because it says ‘Oil’ on the cap), I was 99% sure it was an accident. Still, there was that 1% of doubt, resulting in an emotional moment or few.
What am I getting at here?
We have to be careful with what we do with that 1% when things upset us. Even if it’s 1% vs 99%, it’s still better to give the benefit of the doubt, at least until you know for sure.
In this instance, I was very tempted to send an email…because I’ve never managed to master the skill of talking and crying at the same time. But I knew the email wouldn’t be pretty.
Fortunately common sense kicked in, something that happens more regularly now. Of course it took several dozen embarrassing experiences of acting first, and thinking later to get to this place. Okay, so maybe it was several dozen more times than several dozen. Humiliate yourself often enough, and you tend to lose track after awhile.
Long story short, it had been an accident, something that was quickly and easily taken care of. Had I allowed that 1% of doubt to dictate how I handled it, I could have hurt someone close to me, and then I’d have had to apologize.
It’s not that I don’t say I’m sorry when I’m wrong, but I don’t like to. Therefore I try to live my life so I never have to say those words. I look at it as a win/win. If I never put myself in a position of jumping to conclusions, I won’t risk hurting someone’s feelings. And if I don’t hurt feelings, I never have to say I’m wrong.
While I don’t have as much trouble as the Fonz, I still prefer to avoid the need to say it.